10. Life's a beach and then you drift away.
9. Life's a bleach and then you fade away.
8. The reason men and women do not understand each other is because they belong to different sexes.
7. In the war of the sexes, there are no conscientious objectors.
6.Blub...Blub...Blork! Slosh...Slosh...Splash...Blart! Thpthpthpthpt! Glub...Glub...Glub. Shamu's reflections on life.
5. I'm pink, therefore, I'm Spam.
4. Scientists are trying to find intelligent beings on other planets, probably because they have given up the search here on earth.
3. The university is the greatest repository of knowledge on earth. The freshmen don't bring any in, the seniors don't take any out, and the stuff just naturally accumulates.
2. A scholar is someone who owns more hard-cover books than paperbacks.
1. A professor who comes in much too early is rare; in fact, he's in a class by himself.